I was having a good year, my flares were getting less violent and less frequent, and then I got sick in November and did something stupid - I skipped a dose of Enbrel and Methotrexate while I was battling a vivious sick spell. That was the worst thing to do. On day 2 of my new job, my right hand begin to swell up into the old blown up glove look again. I immediately took my meds, and things got better - Until a month later when my insurance ran out..
All of my prescription drugs are expensive. My Enberl alone is $498.50 a WEEK. My insulin is $190 a bottle, which lasts about two weeks. It would take 2 incomes to pay for all of my meds if I had no insurances (of course if I was a drunk, drugged up, skank who didn't want to work, I could just get some freebies, but I'm employed, so I don't qualify - I'm not going to get off on this tangent now. I also take a chemotherapy, two heart pills, two blood thinners, and pain meds ( for days like today). Thanks to my awesome pharmacy - Winslette Pharmacy on Shorter AVE, I'm able to afford these while my insurance is still kicking in - I'm in that awkward 90 day period where I can't get insurance at work.
So I'm flaring. This is why I've picked up the blog after a year of absence. Since the beginning of January, I have been in constant, seering, miserable, fiery hot pain. The pain that I have been feeling has been not only intolerable, but has sent me into one fainting spell because it was so bad. Imagine dipping your hands into hot lava or putting white, hot charcoal under your shoulder blade, knee, ankles, elbow, wrists or any other joint you have. My hands, wrists, knees, elbows, shoulders, hips, ankles, and the balls of my feet seem to be the most sensitive.
This sslast round has been awful. It has been in my hands for the past three weeks. I've been sleeping with ice and heat every night. I haven't been out with my friends, and I've been putting my best face forward in spite of it. Trying to be drama free and not making it the center of my life.
I'd like to take a moment and say that I have some great friends. You've all heard me bitch and complain and moan about hurting since way before my heart attack. I've said constantly that RA is what will kill me - not heart disease and not diabetes. So I have the greatest friends in the world. My BFF, and partner in Beer Club, Chandra Stone, has had to listen to me for over 5 years complain about my achy this or that, and she's had to put up with my slow ass just getting from the car to wherever we're going. Barbie Lee, my longest running friend, has had to listen to me moan too - especially the weekend that I got us tix to the Hangout Festival, but I could only make it through Widespread Panic and a little My Morning Jacket. I'll dance to Panic though If I have to get one of those numbing shots that NFL players get before games.
I'm still bragging about my friends. I haven't seen much of Robin Scoggin or David Rogers lately, but fate has intervened and brought them back into my life. So I was back at the cabin last night - complaining to them, but only because they asked, and Robin has offered to help me get my strength back. I will settle for range of motion, but I have to start somewhere. It was David, however, who has opened my eyes. He told me about two things - DMSO, and Absorbine - Horse Liniments. I just happened to have a tub of DMSO at home and proceeded to rub down my wrists despite the warning, "NOT FOR HUMAN USE." I received a small amount of releif. More than BioFreeze gives me, but still not enough. Today, I was on my way to Atlanta, and I passed Tractor Supply Company. I stopped in and procured a bottle of Absorbine Gel (also marked not for human use) and applied the ointment. All I can say is that by the third application, the pain is significantly reduced. I'm happy, I'm elated, and I can use my hand!!! I'm a little sore but not in massive pain.
So after all that, It was a horse liniment. Why can't my dr tell me that things like that help? Why can't he tell me what eases the pain? I've been on a thousand websites and discussion boards and I have never read anything about it. I'm shocked and moved by it.
That's all for today - have fun watching the Grammy's tonight
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